My Introduction

My knight in shining armour

You’ve been the one I lost my heart to…

With every breaking dawn I wanted to be yours

Make you mine.

You said there were arrangements

You could just change my life

I was star-struck!

I went back and belonged.

I expected your presence

You compensated with money

A lot of it.

I asked for togetherness

You said its time to move forward

I geared up to walk with you

You decided to run

You chose a different track, a different competitor.

Was I a competition at all?

I crawled with a bruised knee. My heart did not hurt.

A lot of tears, messy, sweaty -soiled my existence

Insomnia led to morning blues

Pills and pillows were not enough

You were my greatest foe!

I hated being a zombie

But that’s all I could afford

And today the sun is shining on me

I still find you charming

But your embrace makes me stiff

I know you need me in the winter of your life

I wanted to be your blanket

You mistook me to be the rug

Not your fault

My fondness was an over-dose

So was my insecurity

I never realized that I never mattered

Or perhaps never wanted to believe

Today you believe in me

Only me

But I’ve got nothing to give you

Except a lot of space

That was once a scarcity

That was something that choked you years back

I still care for you

I have mended my ways…

I no longer get laid when my husband wishes to…

I lie down when I feel the heat

Not necessarily with the man they chose for me

Yes a woman with desire...I am.

I still don’t know dear knight

Why a strange lump visits me on and off

Your helplessness? Or my indifference?

Who cares, I am still the good woman

Who drools over chocolate and Tom ‘n Jerry.