Friday, September 13, 2013

Application by a Rapist



Curriculum Vitae
Name: Rapist
Designation: Rapist
Work Experience: 7 years of successful raping.

Biography: I am a rapist. I have raped several women of various age- some brutally, some easily and some with a lot of resistance. I have also been part of gang rapes. I spearheaded the rape acts. Pioneering in taming the prey and tearing apart her fragile resistance- I personally don’t like raping the weak kind. The ones with a lot of agony interest me a lot.
I have never been arrested by police. But today I have lost my ability to rape. No I have not aged. I am still ripe enough. I now stay in an infirmary. I am writing my CV cum biography to apply for a job. Any job that will help me escape from the everyday rape I undergo. You are amazed? How can a prolific rapist be raped? Yes my future employer, it’s my duty to tell you all the truth.

It was a December night, I was drunk. Sitting inside the bus my basic instincts were getting aroused. I had raped a 27 year old call centre executive a week back. I always believed that women are the best addiction. And they are born to please men. Therefore by force or by fear they are to be acquired. Well, sitting in the bus I was getting a bit restless. I once contemplated visiting a brothel, but then I dropped the idea. The satisfaction you get by taking a fresh thing is completely breath-taking. The bus was empty. It stopped near a shack. The driver went out for some necessity. Just then a girl of about 25 boarded the bus. I spotted my prey. After a while the driver came back. I went to his cabin and shared my idea with him. He too had the chip in him. Slightly drunk, slightly sex-starved he agreed after a bit of debate. He gets his share when I’m done.
I went and sat beside the woman. She did not show any reaction.  All women use ignoring as a weapon. I put an arm across her. She still did not show any reaction. I was taken aback. I looked at her to verify whether she was a prostitute. No, she was not.
I held her hand and pulled her in a crude manner. She offered no resistance. I was getting restless. I slapped her; shook her. She flashed a smile at me. “What’s your problem you bitch? I’m gonna rape you right now!” My intoxicated breath was swishing on her. She said in whispers “It’s alright my son. You can take me. I’ll still pray to lord for your mercy. That’s by default a mother’s duty. Some day you will realize you had raped your mother so many times…In so many forms.” A chill ran down my spine. I noticed, she was wearing a white tunic with a cross round her neck. She was a nun. I was repelled, scared, and jittery. Her smile turned into laughter- Loud, cracking laughter. “Come here, rape me. I’m no one to stop you. You are a rapist, son. The one who has raped her mother. In every woman you raped, your mother’s womb bled. But that does not mean your mum’s angry. She still is praying for you.” I held her wrist, kept slapping her insanely. Her lips were bleeding, but her laughter did not stop. The bus had halted by then. The driver had fled. I lost my sense.
When I woke up I was in an infirmary. I learnt that a girl from the nearby nunnery had brought me here in senseless condition. I dosed off. I was in tremendous mental trauma. I kept dreaming of my deceased mother. She passed away when I was only six years old. In my dreams her smile turned into laughter and her lips bled profusely. I ran away from her. But she ran towards me with stretched arms. I am undergoing meditation sessions. They say I need a job. A laborious one. So I apply for it. Can anyone save me from my mother. She rapes me every day. I want respite.

Yours’ faithfully


Rapist.

Friday, September 6, 2013

GIBBERISH

The morning dew has settled on the leaf of the bonsai. Blessed day. I wake up with a half- moron expression and scroll down my mobile phone. The last sms reads: Recharge immediately to prevent termination of services. I realize I’ve missed a deadline again. Every day I wake up to realize that I don’t belong to the world that revolves around me. This disconnect has almost become a conceit. I relish it so much that I almost rehearse this disconnect. What if one day I wake up to find myself in a place where the mutated Homo sapiens like me stay? Would I then find a new disconnect? Estragon and Vladimir have waited for Godot ever since they understood they are lost. Or maybe the day they found themselves and did not know what to do with those selves. I thus fear finding myself. A disconnect helps me remain in a sort of acceptance. Or maybe a denial. It is a comforting cocoon. Therefore I once again doze off.
As I return from a hectic not-so-happening day at work. I retire. Facebook. Gtalk. Laziness. Three options. Unparallel competition. I choose the third everyday. A compelling addiction. So as I lie down to romance my leisure. I meet the Becketians. Or I guess the Becketians meet me. A blurry dimension. Smile fades only to replace a very queer expression. Estragon sits near my head and pats my forehead. I wish he knew how to massage. But even if he did he would not have executed the knowledge. Long back they have lost the pretension of compulsion. You have it doesn’t mean you show it. Or maybe you show it but not always have it. Bizarre the effect Estragon has on me. I swear by my monotony- I don’t want them to enter my inner space. But always, invariably they do. Vladimir speaks slowly. He sits near my feet. I feel like Krishna torn between Pandavas and Kauravas. The only difference there’s no battle. Or maybe there’s no battle field. Battle is like liquid. It comes alive in a package. I lack that. Thus all my battles are without shape. So in my shapeless battle called life...eh! It sounds so Wordsworthian. And I detest the Lucy-kid. No offence meant to his hugely lyrical ballad. So before I digress into one of my weirdness- let my put a period to my evening.

Night bestows and I wonder who I am? No a philosopher would not have been a competition. I promise to do “nothing” better than them at times. Especially with some beloved Vodka in my system. So here speaks the Vodkaish oracle. (Nothing Russian about it): My life has always been a short story, or so I love to believe. Digressions often break the rule- and my life tends to become a novel. Right then the cruel editor uses her skills to refine. And once again I become a short story tending to deviate. Well that's the thrill of it. You are never what you think you are. Catharsis, hence never comes.
And at the end what I understand is I have understood nothing. Neither have you.